Hiashi's Birthday
by NeoMoonPrincess
Summary: Hiashi takes a deep, impatient breath, and turns slowly to his nephew. "A girlfriend, WHY DO YOU CARE?" he snaps, glaring at his nephew. 8D CRACK,Implied Nejiten


Hiashi is sitting at a table in front the entire Hyuga clan. He is wearing his regular clothes, plus a pink and yellow striped party hat that says "birthday girl" on it. The 'girl' is crossed out poorly with a marker, and has 'boy' written on top of it. A disco ball(Hiashi's secret obsession) is hanging over his head.

"Happy birthday, Hiashi-sama!!!!" several Hyuga clan main-house members place a big Hello Kitty cake in front of Hiashi, who smirks. "Thank you.." he looks at the cake.

"Why are there only 4 candles?" he hisses angrily. A main house member shrugs.

"It's all the store had."

"I see.."

"Blow out the candles, Hiashi-sama!" someone says.

Hiashi glares at him. "Silence, branchie!"

Then, he whispers something, and blows out the candles. The clan erupts into applause, and Hiashi looks very pleased with himself. Neji walks over to him slyly.

"So, uncle, what did you wish for?"

Hiashi shakes his head, smiling. "Its nothing."

"C'mon, Hiashi-sama."

"Its NOTHING, Neji."

"C'MON, tell me!"

Hiashi stares at the crowd of people. The entire Hyuga clan is listening now. Crap-crappity-crap-crap.

Hiashi takes a deep, impatient breath, and turns slowly to his nephew.

"A girlfriend, WHY DO YOU CARE?" he snaps, glaring at his nephew. (A/N: Thnx Smosh)

Neji can't help but giggle. Because today is Hiashi's 40th birthday, and he is still single.

Hiashi gets mad. "Hyuga Neji!"

"Yes, Hiashi-sama!"

"This is your fault! Go train all day and then ask that girl on your team out!"

Neji leaves, cursing, cuz he's too shy to ask Tenten out. Hinata goes up to her father.

"Ano..Happy birthday, father-"

"Ah! You! So weak- go train!"

"H-hai!" Poor sweet Hinata runs off. As soon as Hinata and Neji are gone, Hiashi snaps his fingers. The disco ball over his head starts spinning, and there are lights everywhere. Hiashi stands up, ripping his clothes off to reveal white spandex covered in silver sequins from head to toe. He has a red rose in his hand.

"EVERYONE! As head of this clan, I command you to dance!" On cue, some random Elvis Presley music starts to play. People start dancing, cuz no one wants to face Hiashi. Hiashi notices this and gets really mad. So, he throws his cake at the crowd and runs to his room, slamming the door and falling on his bed crying and having a tantrum, throwing his pillows and his blanket everywhere. Reaching under his mattress, he pulls out a picture.

"Kevyn Aucoin-sama, you still love me, right?" Hiashi says to the picture of his idol. (A/N: Kevyn Aucoin is a really famous makeup artist. But, um, he's dead now.)

"Hiashi-sama! Terrible news!" some main branch member runs into Hiashi's room, tripping on his blanket(which is on the floor from when he threw it during his tantrum), and landing flat on his face.

"What is it? If it has something to do with Neji, I don't care. If it has something to do with Hinata, just throw water on her, she'lle wake up." Hiashi says, turning over on his bed so he is on his back. The main branch member shakes his head. "Hinata-sama has not fainted, Hiashi-sama, but she would if she knew the news! Kevyn Aucoin-sama died a long time ago!"

Tears fill Hiashi's eyes. "Whatttt? This..this can't be...ITS NOT TRUE!!! YOU LIE!!!!" He screams, pointing at the poor clan member, and then runs out of his room.

Later that day, Hiashi is seen standing on a bridge, throwing flower petals into the river running below. Neji walks past, because he is taking Tenten out on a date, _finally_. He sees his depressed looking uncle there.

"Hiashi-sama? What are you doing?"

Hiashi turns slowly, and grins at Neji. "Im Hiashi, paying respects to my Idol, who is dead, by the way. Follow me in my path of misery, as I unlock the truth to be held in a peaceful silence..." Neji and Tenten quickly walk away from Hiashi, who continues ranting and doesn't bother to notice.

A while later, Hinata walks past her father and notices him. "Ano..Father? Are y-you alright?" Hiashi turns slowly, and grins at her. "Im Hiashi, paying respects to my Idol, who is dead, by the way. Follow me in my path of misery, as I unlock the truth to be held in a peaceful silence..." Hinata stares at him. Hiashi gets mad. "What are you staring at? And why haven't you fainted yet?" he shrieks. Hinata stares at him horrified. "F-father..."

"What?!"

"Is..is that.." Hinata points at Hiashi's chest. The first two buttons of his shirt are undone, revealing his silver-sequins disco outfit from before. Hiashi snorts. "It's my disco outfit. What of it? Gotta a problem with it, princess?" he says, making all these random hand gestures. Hinata shakes her head...and faints.


End file.
